The quiet power of small gestures

The simple act of giving can have a surprising ripple effect. 

Something as effortless as a smile and eye contact with someone, as you pass them, can lift their spirits just when they may need it. It is easy to become inward-focused, and concerned only with happenings in our own lives; but we are living alongside others who may be experiencing severe struggles. 

Our place is not necessarily to save them, but by simply appreciating or acknowledging them we can help others to shift their perspective, even slightly. Sometimes, to be seen, is to be saved.

Giving is about well-timed acts of kindness and compassion, and a way of balancing out what we are fortunate enough to receive in our lives. Simply caring is often the best way to play our part in the wellness of others. 

In a life without giving, we can become immune and insensitive to the needs of others, and forget that we are all connected, and that we all have a role to play.

Being alive on Earth, at this time, can be seen as a gift. We are not here to relentlessly take what we need and want. We can, in fact, decide to live as if we are here to experience, to grow and to contribute. 

In the lotto of life, many are born into homes of privilege and love, support and resources. We can choose to always be grateful for that and to have empathy and kindness for those who were born into lives of less. So many find the strength and grit to rise above hardship and challenge and into a place of personal power, and it takes a monumental effort,  incredible perseverance and the support and belief of others.

Give some thought to the following questions to discover ways in which you give to others.

What can you give to others in need that is not only monetary? What is the nicest time-related gift that you have been given by someone else? What bothers you about your community or society, and what difference can you decide to make? Who would benefit from more time with you? Who can you be kinder to, or more patient with? What is one kind thing you could do for someone else, today? What are five rarely used possessions that you could give to someone who could really use them?

Giving is about being of service, both to yourself and to others. We can all make a difference with regular, caring contributions of our choice. We can aim to uplift in small or big ways; and through our interactions over a lifetime, can leave the world better than we found it. 

Consciously shift your focus outwards, and be open to the difference you can make to others, to your community, to your country by simply giving.

So what can we choose to give? Give kindness; positivity; acknowledgement; time; compassion; an audience. And especially when you know someone needs it: a hug, a note, an arm squeeze, a message, a blessing. 

Give to yourself too so that you may have strength to give to others; give for the sake of giving and know that the waves of good energy will spread in concentric circles around you.  

Giving to yourself

First, you can decide to be on your own side always. Try any (or all!) of these: Take a walk outdoors; cook a healthy meal; close your eyes and take deep, slow breaths for five full minutes; do 20 jumping jacks with a big smile on your face; find a book that really interests you and go to bed early with it one night; lie in bed one morning with a delicious cup of something and read (a book or magazine) for at least half an hour; arrange to go for a cup of coffee with a friend; buy some flowers and put them in a place where they will make you smile; watch a great movie; listen to a good podcast; create a playlist of your favourite songs; or take up a new hobby.

If a family member is experiencing a significant challenge and needs to talk, listen fully, without interruption, until they have finished speaking. 

Acknowledge their feelings, without feeling the need to pep them up straight away. Let them feel their sadness, anger or frustration so that it can pass through them and they can begin to come out the other side. Solutions are not always what is required – sometimes it is more about acknowledgement. 

Decide on small, meaningful acts of love or kindness for those close to you – a note in a lunch box, a flower in a vase in a bedroom, a favourite meal, a time-saving act, a small gift, or a sincere phone call.

Read to somebody: it can be a wonderful way to give of your time, and share in the joy of a story. 

Winston Churchill once said: “We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” DM